Kremlin‑Style Cutlet

 

Alik Bakhshi

Kremlin‑Style Cutlet

 

 

   It is well known that there is a dish called “Chicken Kyiv,” made from chicken. Today, during the period of confrontation with Ukraine, Russia has presented a new culinary invention in response — one that supposedly also solves a food‑supply problem — namely, the “Kremlin Cutlet.” The recipe was shared online by the head of the National Guard, General Zolotov (https://youtu.be/w7_HexIZcGs).

   It must be said that the cooking method is the same, and it differs from the Kyiv version only in that, instead of a pounded chicken breast, it uses a cutlet made from Navalny. Of course, no one has yet tried the dish proposed by the general, since Mr. Navalny is being held in prison, and the hungry public is waiting for him to be released.

   I suppose that as soon as the National Guard’s ideological adviser, Khinshtein — who, unlike Zolotov, has a higher education — properly writes up the recipe, Navalny will be handed over to the general, whose hands are itching to feed the Russian people with this budget‑friendly dish.

 

    13 October 2018